The worry of a thousand others
Someone once asked me this, “what are you supposed to do when you know their problems but can’t fix it?”
You are not always supposed to fix every problem you come across. At times, you are supposed to just listen and give them a resting shoulder because that’s what you’re equipped to offer.
Every day of our lives, we are more and more engrossed by the conditions surrounding our needs and wants. We find ourselves completely concerned about what is going wrong, not paying any mind to the person next door.
Yet, some days, you are keenly reminded to appreciate how your story is a bit pale next to someone else’s because how dare you complain about being broke when your friend who smiles every day is suicidal and you have no idea because you’re so worried about your situation.
Why should your five years old relationship ending be as important as your closest friend losing his fiancée to the cold hands of death. Why would the constant anti-depressants you take be as important as the keloids your friend operates every now and then.
It doesn’t even make sense how much pain is in the world. IT is completely absurd. We didn’t ask to be brought to life but we have to deal with life’s problems every single day until we can’t no more. Make me understand how that works.
You see, nothing else matters when the people we love and care for deeply are going through the nastiest corners of life. We want a way to ease their aches, to comfort their throbbing hearts. We hope, pray, wish and imagine they live a problem-free life. We just need their problems to dial down so they can be fine again.
But, that’s not always the case. The bitter truth is suffering has become so normalized. Many have also become so used to the “my condition is quite worse compared to yours so you’ve got to brace up” attitude. Nothing else seem to matter because we all have our lives to deal with.
What could happen if we used about 10% of our thinking capacity to remember that the kid next door just might be having as much hard time as you are. Sometimes, it might not even matter which is more grave. Just because they are the happiest in the room does not mean they have it all figured out.
Taking a moment to realize that the new societal norms have to be abolished asap will be a great step towards this direction, tbh.
I read a tweet about the Japan origin of unity. A boy backed his dead baby brother during the war. A soldier saw him and thereafter told him to dispose of the body. He told the soldier, “No, he is my brother!”
This brought tears to the eyes of the soldier and the image gave some much strength and reminder to always carry a brother along. “NEVER LEAVE YOUR BROTHER BEHIND”.
We cannot continue to live without learning to pull our brothers’ along. An act of kindness even when it’s the last thing you hope to show goes a long way. Kindness used to be so important and it always will. A day to check on the kids with benign cancer or a random hug after listening to a woman rant about her terminal disease could really calm them shoulders.
You don’t have to be special before showing kindness neither do you have to have your worries erased first. Being a different human doesn’t come naturally, it is a habit that is cultured.
